I seek Enlightenment.. A light to show me the way..

*Note. the words "you" are all pluralistic reference to a collective whole. if you get offended, please change your attitude.

Humility is so precious.. its so often lost.. so rare.. at this day and age.. so disheartening to find how few actually do possess such a virtue.

my heartfelt thanks to certain people in my life. for showing me the importance of being humble. may our bonds of kinship be strong and firm. =)

also.. thank you to those who showed me how ugly one’s life can be without humility. i wish you all the best. and good luck in your endeavours. cuz you’ll be liberated from my presence, i’ll like to have absolutely nothing to do with you.

who am i to judge? let the judge be time. and let the jury be you, yourself.. then, we’ll see the true image that you really are.

argue.. talk.. blabber.. ENOUGH!! i don’t need your opinions.. nor do i need you to refer to any texts. enough i say.. "The Devil can cite scripture for his own use." Nobody’s perfect. but attempting to appear perfect…is simply ridiculous.

I’ve grown sick of you.. parasitical ‘friends’.. tired of hearing all those words of comfort. spoken out of courtesy. with no conviction. myth. you shall remain as one. remain as insignificant as your spoken words. you smile now.. but you must know.. the last laugh is on you..

Be Prepared……

The Art of Eating, they say is : "Love, Food, and Happiness".. sounds pretty cheesy.. but i got it from a movie. the title, sorry, its been so long since i last watched it so i kinda forgot. well, i didn’t however, forget about this quote.

The main character claims that it should be called the Art of Living. absolutely spot-on.. haha.. many people have dwelt too long in their self-imposed dreams.. and have conveniently forgotten about life[Life].

I believe that through eating,one may achieve a higher level of appreciation. it reminds us that we are alive. it makes us aware how ‘fortunate’ we are.. honestly speaking, who knows for sure how lucky we are to even exist..? i mean, if the asteroid had hit Earth 2 hours later 65MYA.. then we wouldn’t have this ’supremacy’ that we now ‘cherish’ over all other species in the world.

agree or not? up to you dear..

the interesting thing is, eating good food for me, is aesthetical.. it is primieval. it is uplifting. in fact, its my way of going back to my roots. to savour the flavour. again. i see the tastes all too well. glorious sensations, a beautiful display of scent and seasoning.. arghh.. culminating in an orgasm of the tongue.. if i’m lucky.. LOL.

I Love Food..

But hey.. that is only one-third of what’s important in life.. there is still "Love & Happiness" three intertwine to produce.. what i deem to be a ‘perfect’ life. this, i will forever remember..

what is film? what is a movie? what is a show? what is a performance? all of them are all works of art. to be appreciated. to be a feast for the senses. that is how i feel. i hate those incompetent idiots. who talk loudly in the theatre. who chat with the friend beside them. when all their knowledge was based on what they saw, yet the movie was based on classic successful francises. argh.. i paid for a ticket you know.. and i feel that some people really has caused a devaluation of art. the distinction is clear. courtesy as an artform is nearly dead! please, join me in reviving it. i know, i may not be a good starting point. but i want to change things around. i’m not perfect. i jus wanna improve. to me, films, and plays, etcetra, are all works of aesthetics as vivid as a painting and can tell you so much more than one. it is the embodiment of motion, auditory as well as visual sensations captured within a reel of film. it is how the artist reaches out to us. it is how a story is told. how wars were fought and gloriously lost. how humanity triumphs in our enduring vanity. is it fair for me to judge? i don’t know. you tell me. i am merely venting out my frustration against the common modern day atrocity that is disturbing the peace of a fellow audience. it stems the creative flow. haiz. sorry for the rant. please, try not to be offended. i am on a critiquing spell against society in the most general of terms. at least, the societies within the two neighbouring countries that i know best. "it’s the same everywhere.." lol.

full circle. one cycle. half of the journey gone. and i am at a lost. one month at home and i had a strange, gradual epiphany.

that my life here, in this island, ain’t what it was meant to be. but, fault or not remains to be determined. why this journey? why this place? what could have happened, if only i made no attempt to cross over? entering foreign shores.. i believe i have not quite settled in with their culture.

yes, change is good; yet, i simply have to resist. rebel. when my personal values are at stake. i simply have to turn vigilante. gosh..

time. one thing that is most precious. most wanted. most mysterious. if only i could turn back time. i’d correct my mistakes. hoping hard, i would’ve made the future better. however, the balance that was shifted will then be restored with a certain negative force, wouldn’t it?

ok. that was highly metaphysical. but its a belief. and i don’t feel that it is balderdash. please comment.

i must confess. i am a weeper.. or rather, i was. i’d cry my heart out. when sad. when lonely. when depressed. when angered. but, something has caught me.. i can’t explain it. my tears.. my wonderful tears seem to have dried. i have this ‘turmoil’ if you will this recent weeks.. and yet not a single tear was shed.. and i am wondering, how will i ever release this pent-upped sorrow. nothing works. HELP ME!!!